I'm going back to swimming on wednesday! I'm so excited to see my coach and all my friends- I haven't been in a month. I'm a bit scared of what my coach will say- but I shouldn't be. What I am nervous about is getting into a suit triggering my depression again. It was the main reason I took a break- to handle the depression. I don't want it to interfear (sp?) again. And god damn it- I want to be skinny. I was doing really well and then my bro and his gf made fondue- it was so good- I had cheese/bread and chocolate/a lot. His gf is so beautiful too. She's the only female rolemodel I have in my life, honestly. She's smart, beautiful, funny, skinny, has great hair, confident, and has a great boyfriend. Ugh- jealous. Any tips on losing weight? I know I have a problem actually getting up and going to the gym, but I guess I have to make it a habit.